Tag Archive: Adam and Eve


Americans like to fix things.  We struggle with the idea that something can’t be fixed.  When something reaches that state, if not before, we throw it away and go looking for a replacement.   

If we deem an item unfixable or, better yet, too expensive to fix, we throw it away.  I was told by a car sales manager that they design most sales campaigns for the desire to own the next model, not obsoleteness.  Few wait till their car is on it’s last legs to purchase their next car.  Not only are we bent on fixing things we can be quick to throw them away as well.

We like to think we don’t don’t function that way with people. When it’s people, there are issues that cannot be fixed. There is this group of men I meet with on Tuesday nights.  It’s called Pirate Monks.  Pirate Monks is for men who are struggling in life with anything at all to come and participate with our #1 goal in mind.  That goal is to speak honestly from the 1st person perspective.   

Every meeting we remind the participants to allow someone to get their words out, and we are not there to fix them.  We remind each other to only ask questions after someone speaks.  It doesn’t take long for the men to go down a rabbit hole.  The questions turn into statements.  The statements are directed to the “honest” participant in order to fix them.  We will deny it, but we really do value our own opinion.  

This past week I had to turn to one of the guys and state, “Ask a question!”  Eventually it all kicked in, and we began to ask good questions.  A good question is not for the speaker to gain information.  A really good question makes the responder think.  A great question will stick with someone a long time.  

Jesus asked great questions.     From time to time, those he asked questions to could not respond.  It wasn’t that they couldn’t.  The answer penetrated the heart.  In the old days we used to call it “meddlin.”  However, a good question from someone that loves us isn’t meddling but rather great love.  

Some of the hundreds of questions Jesus asked stick out.  He didn’t need the answer.  He needed others to see the answer.  Some that stand out to me include:

“Why do you doubt?”

“Who do people say the Son of Man is?”

“Where is your faith?”

“What are you looking for?”

“If I am telling  the truth, why do you not believe me?”

These are just a sampling of what I call “questions of the heart.”  My favorite is, “Who are you looking for?”  While this piercing question was directed at the soldiers who came to arrest him, it is a question we can ask every day.  We all seem to be looking for someone, not so much something.  We are looking for someone to love us, care for us, encourage us, validate us, and stay with us no matter what.  Oh, there are plenty of people that speak enticing words to us.  We get so easily seduced with words. When we get tired of empty words, we tend to resort to things to fill our yearnings.  The sense of peace doesn’t last long.   

I was reading a book the other day that revealed the first recorded words between God and man.  It was something I didn’t think about.  The question can be found in Genesis 3.  God asked, “Where are you?”  I have not been able to get that one out of my brain since.

God knew the answer.  Man was hiding from him.  God wasn’t waiting to hear the answer.  His question was for Adam and Eve to hear their own words.  From the beginning we see the amazing art of a good question.

As Christians we live in a world that is sick and tired of us telling them what they have to believe and what they have to do.  I can’t say I blame them at all.  We often expect others to live like Jesus, and, when they don’t, we act surprised.  Once, someone else reveals his or her issues, we think have to fix em.  Do this.  Do that.  All you need is my formula.  The list of fix-its go on forever, and we become god.

God didn’t show up in the garden and say, “I know where you are Adam.  Come on out and get what’s coming to you.”  Not at all.  He needed Adam to grasp the situation.  He wanted Adam to hear his own words.  It was Adam who needed to figure out where he was.  It was Adam in his relationship with God that had to say, “I’m afraid.  I’m naked.  I’m hiding.”  Ahh, the right question reveals the heart.  It’s the heart that needs change, not the behavior.

Next time your spouse is in a bad place, try a good question and don’t expect an answer.  Next time your kids got your blood boiling, ask a really good question and look out for the answer.  Next time a friend is running crazy, ask a great question and be prepared to walk that extra mile.  Till we learn to ask a good question, let’s try shutting up so we can hear their heart.  A little prayer seeking the right question goes a long way as well.

So, where are you?  What are you looking for?  Who are you looking for? 

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I met the my friend for breakfast as we normally do. We are slowly building a friendship meeting bi-weekly, having good conversations about life. We come from different backgrounds but seek the peace of God in our lives. We are weary travelers on the road of life, and it’s a pleasure to have someone walk a few miles alongside.
This day I didn’t feel like talking. I wanted to complain. Please do not think that pastors don’t go through times of depression, anger, discouragement and disappointment. If a pastor tells you he doesn’t, either he is lying or he has not been in the position long enough. So, complain I did.
My friend is a talker. It’s his nature. After he commented that I seemed tired and asked how I was, he sat and listened. For the next 10 to 15 minutes, he said very little. I actually stopped once thinking he wanted to interject some sort of wisdom. Instead he sat there with the strangest grin on his face. So, I continued to clearly let him know where I was, and I was not in a good place. The sheep were winning. This shepherd was not happy. By the way, “happy” is one of the least used words in the Bible. Probably because our state of happiness is based on circumstances not internal peace.
I don’t know if I was testing my new friend to see how far I could go till he either would try to fix me (please don’t try), or placate me with trite sayings, or use out of text Bible verses. Regardless, he didn’t do any of those relationship killers. Instead, he listened well. HIs first statement was true as he pointed out, “You seem depressed and angry. You know they often go together.” He was dead on.
At that point I expected him to start the “fix it” or tell me about what he would do. We all do that a lot. What works for one person is not necessarily, and, actually I will say seldom, is the recipe for anyone else. That’s the major problem with self-help books. We all have different baggage, interpretive lenses, and family histories. What is really happening at those times is the shifting of attention to ourselves.
Instead, my friend asked me if he could tell me about the time he was institutionalized with a Jesus fixation. It was more than a Jesus fixation. He actually believed he was Jesus incarnate. Yes, he had a mental illness. I was not sure where he was going with this one but we continued walking together.
He told me about his thought patterns. When one really believes he is Jesus and nobody will listen, depression and anger hitch a ride. Meanwhile, when one thinks he is Jesus coming off his “rightness” doesn’t happen. Everybody else is wrong. They have to be; they aren’t Jesus. It went on for a few minutes, not real long.
At first I was thinking, what does this have to do with anything. We have talked about this before. I began to hear instead of listen, or do I have that one backwards? He began to talk about taking on a self-induced suffering since no one would come along with him. It was at that point the Holy Spirit clued me in. Suddenly, I was massively humbled. I got it. I didn’t like it but I got it.
It isn’t only the mentally ill who may have problems with thinking they are Jesus. It’s all of us. I’ve heard people say, “We all want to be god.” Only the word “god” is too generic. The name “Jesus” puts skin on it. Let’s face it, when life isn’t going the way we want it to go, we become complainers. If no one listens, we can easily become angry. If nothing happens, we can slip into an anger-induced depression. Why? It’s not because I want God to do things my way. It’s because I want to be Jesus. I want to be right. I want people to respond to “ME!” I want things to go my way. If they don’t, I will self-inflict “poor pitiful me” suffering to prove I am who I claim to be. We all do this, only we don’t want to acknowledge it.
When Adam and Eve sinned against God in the Garden of Eden, the sin goes much deeper then we think. And Jesus keeps pouring out his grace over and over and over. Good thing he is the real Jesus and not me or you.